The Vacillator / Avoider Core Pattern
Recorded on March 30, 2023
A core pattern is the reactive cycle a couple falls into when each of their attachment styles gets provoked or triggered. As the core pattern progresses, emotions and reactive behaviors escalate, and as they do, more and more damage is done to each other and to the marriage. Both persons in the relationship believes the other person is to blame and sadly if nothing changes divorce ensues or an intact marriage deteriorates into an ugly state of co-existence. The core pattern is the true enemy NOT your spouse.
Our Love Styles (attachment styles) were formed within our brains very early in our development. This is why we don’t remember the lengthy process that shaped how we feel and react within relationships. Attachment Core Pattern Therapy helps a couple understand how they were each imprinted with a different style, the way the combination reacts, and how to slow down the pattern and begin to heal toward Secure Attachment which is less reactive.
Stated simply, your marriage problems started way before you ever met one another. A marriage then can be described as two colliding histories. With little to no understanding, the couple is helpless to change. Come join us as we share the three most common core patterns, and how to begin the journey of growth to escape the core pattern’s grip.