What is Love? And who is my neighbor? (Part 2)

So, Jesus told us how to love our neighbor by telling the story of the Good Samaritan.

The robbed and beaten man had obvious wounds… easy to see.

Most of us have non obvious wounds… that are more difficult to see

If we’re honest, our wounds become most visible when we enter into community.

Relationship exposes our non obvious wounds.

Marriage, parenting, church, work, and friendships show the real us.

  • Irritability
  • Anger & rage
  • Reactivity
  • Over Trusting
  • Avoidance
  • Controlling
  • Lying
  • Allowing others to control me.
  • Excessive need for approval and harmony.
  • Idealizing and devaluing others.
  • Hyper connection: Fusing and enmeshing with others.
  • Hypo connection:  Distance, lack of engagement.

Under these behaviors, however are the real non obvious wounds:

  • Fear
  • Discouragement
  • Hopelessness
  • Anxiety
  • Broken heartedness
  • Shame
  • Embarrassment
  • Humiliation
  • Rejection

But unlike our first parents, Adam and Eve who physically hid and covered themselves, we stay out in public, but we hide by creating a false self.

I refer to this as a façade of competency … just like Main Street Disneyland… a fake front and an unattractive other side.   For most of us, we desperately want to believe in the false self and desire others to see it (and be impressed) as well.

Our non obvious wounds that Jesus tells us we need to have loved by others, are skillfully hidden, so for the most part, we go unloved.

Love = showing our non obvious wounds (our true selves) to others and allowing them to care for us.

More next week, thanks for listening,