The Secure Connector: #16 in a series. Trait: I know how to use my anger to identify more vulnerable feelings underneath the anger and communicate the more vulnerable feelings. When angry people explode, they only have one answer as to why they got angry… “Because you made me mad!” Wow, now that’s an answer […]
Trait: I can control the level of my reactivity so I am able to stay engaged in difficult conversations. Phyllis: “I hate it when he lies to me, he’s always shading the truth, misleading me or outright lying to me. I don’t trust him and I just want to know what else he is hiding. […]
Special Announcement Saturday, November 3, 2012 6:00-10:00 PM Arroyo Trabuco Golf Club 26772 Avery Parkway, Mission Viejo, CA 92692 This special event will include a silent auction, hors d’oeuvres, dinner and testimonies from people who are experiencing a 180 relational turn in their lives. At the end of the evening you will be given the […]
Special Announcement: Relationship 180 wil lhold its annual Fall Celebration and Fundraiser on Saturday, November 3rd at Arroyo Trabuco Golf Club. We would love to have you join us! For more informaiton, and to RSVP, please go to Relationship180.com. Milan and Kay are in Dallas this weekend speaking at a New Life marriage weekend. Please […]
Traits of a Secure Connector: I am not afraid of conflict because I have skills to discuss, compromise and most often resolve conflict. What was conflict like in your home growing up? Loud? Chaotic? A free-for-all? Non-existent? Did you observe repairs after something went wrong? Conflict is a part of life and the Bible is […]
The Secure Connector: #19 in a series. Trait: I don’t hold on to resentments and am able to forgive my spouse. When Shirley came into my office with her husband, I asked her what was bothering her the most about their marriage. “He’s hurt me so many times… over and over.” “By now if he […]
Trait: I have compassion for my spouse in their areas of weakness because I understand their childhood wounds that contributed to those areas of struggle. Last week we looked at Shirley and her difficulty with holding on to resentment and inability to forgive her spouse. I listed several things that Shirley needed to do to […]
Trait: I have a relationship with God as well as close friends and don’t expect my spouse to meet every need. As a couple’s counselor, one my tasks is to dispel the myths and fantasies about romance that have permeated the people’s thinking. When Josh & Karen came into my office, their marriage was in […]
Trait: I don’t have secrets I am keeping from my mate. Some of the most relationally destructive stories I’ve heard as a marriage counselor have been when a husband or wife inadvertently discovers secrets that have been hidden by their spouse. Just to name a few… • Secret bank accounts and credit cards. • Another […]
Traits of the Secure Connector: Asking for Redo’s. Well we have been in a long but important series on all the traits of the secure connector. These can serve as goals no matter what love style you are. Today we write on a very important topic that we hope will become common place in your […]