Favorite Parenting Tips

Favorite Parenting Tips

Here are some of my favorite parenting tips.  I know some of them came from Parenting With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition) which is a must read for all you parents.  It is written by Jim Fay and Foster Cline and there is a version for teens as well.   Parenting Teens With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition).

(Note: The links above will take you to Amazon.com so that you can learn more about these great books which should be read and kept handy at all times).

If you’re a parent we hope you have invested in our How We Love as Parents Workshop available on our website at:

How We Love As Parents

This six hour seminar looks at the five love styles and how each with

  • STATE YOUR WISHES IN THE POSITIVE WHENEVER POSSIBLE!

Instead of :  “You get in and clean that room now and I don’t want to see
your face until you do!”
Try:  “Feel free to join us for lunch after you have cleaned your room.”

Instead of:  “If you chew with your mouth open again, I’m going to send
you to your room.”
Try:  People at the table with good manners will get desert tonight.  I
hope you can remember to chew with your mouth closed.

  • GIVE CHOICES WHENEVER POSSIBLE,   AVOID THREATS

“You’re welcome to settle this fight calmly or go play alone in two separate rooms.”

“Would you rather pick up your toys or pay me to do it? My charge for cleaning is…..”  Make the cost appropriate to your child’s age.

“You can get ready for school here at home, in the car or in the bathroom at school.  I have some extra clothes in the car in case you are still in your pajamas when it’s time to go.

What would be best for you?  Would you like to clean your room in the morning or afternoon?”  OK.  Afternoon is fine.  You are welcome to join the family for dinner when your room is clean.”

“Feel free to take your red jacket or your blue sweater.” If you don’t want to choose, no problem, I’ll choose for you.

  • GET SAD NOT MAD.  RESPOND WITH EMPATHY INSTEAD OF MORALIZING:

Moralizing sounds like this:
“Well, that’s what you get… I warned you!”
“I hope you learned your lesson.”
“See, if you would only listen to me this wouldn’t happen.”

Instead try:

“Wow what a mess, I hope you finish cleaning your room in time for dinner.”

“I’m sorry,   I get hungry too when I miss a meal so I know how you feel.  How about we have an extra big breakfast?

“I bet your teacher has a good plan for what to do about unfinished homework.  I hope it works out for you tomorrow at school.”

I know you would love the car keys tonight and I’d love to give them to you but last time you were late getting home and I lost sleep.  I don’t think I’m up for loosing sleep tonight.  Let me know if you have plans next weekend and we can try again.

It’s so sad when you see something you really want and you spent all your money.  Let me know if you want to earn some more money.   

Thanks and blessings,

Love,

Milan & Kay

Next week: More of The Very BEST Parenting Tips!